• Jun
  • 25

Jessica Bruinsma: Saved By the Bra!

And to think - so many women burned theirs. Shame, shame. Jessica saved herself where any normal man (or 1960s feminist) would have died a cold, lonely death. Three cheers to the mighty brassiere!

No word on what happened to that “friend,” but we’re glad to report Jessica has been rescued - thanks to a little bit of Yankee ingenuity. After losing herself in bad weather, she fell off a cliff and (stop…

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  • May
  • 15

The Vatican Gives the Greenlight to Space Aliens

The Vatican just released a statement saying that they believe in aliens and it’s all part of “God’s creative freedom”. But what if their idea of an alien turns out to be wrong? Deadly wrong? muuuhaaahaaa

I’m wondering, though, what would happen if these aliens turn out to be lusty drunks who use birth control, have abortions, eat meat on Friday, and are hopelessly vain? Will the Vatican still be singing their praises? What if our…

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